1. dontforgettobelieve:

    No matter how many times I watch this I crack up every single fucking time. HOT POCKETS!

     
     
  2. quonnyjew:

    This dude is really embracing the whole “I fucked a hot pocket, recorded a video of it, and posted it on vine” thing

    you do you, @versacepoptarts 

     
  3. haleyscomett-art:

    I FOUND IT

    NO ONE BELIEVED ME WHEN I SAID I HEARD AN ICE CREAM TRUCK DROPIN BEATS DOWN THE STREET

    NOW I HAVE A VID TO PROVE IT OMG I’M SO HAPPY I DIDN’T IMAGINE IT YOU GUYS HAVE NO IDEA HOW HAPPY THIS MAKES ME

    (via zackisontumblr)

     
     

  4. ohmyespinosa:

    sarabatikha:

    thefandomlyfe:

    m-a-l-t-a-r-a:

    takemewherethewildthingsare:

    paint-me-a-butt:

    mishassbuttofthelord:

    mcdolans:

    every single person who reblogs this

    every

    single

    person


    will get “doot doot” in their ask box

    HOW

    I WANT TO KNOW YOUR SECRET

    SERIOUSLY THOUGH WHAT ARE YOU

    I GOT THIS AND I WAS LIKE WHAT THE FUCK

    imagethere are over 128,000 notes and i still got one

    how

    image

    I GOT A DOOT DOOT AND THIS HAD LIKE 700k NOTES

    (via chipsweg)

     
  5. (Source: coolscar, via hi)

     

  6. "

    Look around your college classroom, spot the virgins.

    See, this seems like a game until you skip over the girl with a short skirt and hair in front of her eyes because you heard last summer that she slept with like nineteen guys. You can’t see her hands, but they’re under the table, pulling a rosary through her fingers as she tries to wash the sin off her. She’s only ever kissed three people in her whole life and they’re all girls. She turned down the wrong guy and he told everyone she’s “a whore.” The label “slut” stuck to the bottom of her shoe and swallowed her up.

    But that quiet girl who is always reading probably never touched someone else’s penis, you figure, because you don’t know that she goes home and strips down and pulls on tight black leather, you don’t know she’s got a set of whips that could make any set of knees quiver, you don’t know because she’s proud of what she does but she’s not stupid enough to let anyone know about it. She’s sexy, just not here, not where people judge.

    See, the truth is: you have no idea who has lost their virginity, because it doesn’t change you. It doesn’t give you some kind of glow or superpower or stamp on your forehead. You know the feeling of waking up on your birthday and thinking “I don’t feel any older whatsoever”? That’s what maybe they’re all so afraid of you finding out: sex doesn’t change you. Sex doesn’t make you an animal, sex doesn’t suddenly make your relationship a million times more stable or intimate or romantic - it can’t fix what’s broken, although it can make the pain go away for a bit. Sex doesn’t really occur with eighty tea lights and a thick white rug. Sex is ugly and loud and frequently awkward, sex is excellent and breathtaking and when you wake up the next morning, you’re the exact same person. There’s not some magical connection with the person in bed beside you. Believe it or not, pregnancy isn’t some kind of punishment - but practice safe sex, get tested, don’t spread your germs around. They want to tell you, “Sex can ruin you” and I’ve heard that a lot as a little girl, that some boy would join me under my sheets and then dump me four days after, used, unhappy.

    But I figured out that I’m not a fucking toy. Letting someone have sex with me is not letting them “use” me, because I’m not an object. My father said the issue lay in the fact “Men are insecure and need to know that they’re the best you ever had,” but I think that’s a steaming crock of absolute-wrong and if I didn’t tell the people I’m with how many others I’d slept beside, there would be literally no way for them to know my number, because I don’t rust, I don’t wear out, I don’t get bruised. I’m not a wilting fruit, I don’t go rotten.

    But here’s the thing: some people connect sex and emotion. I don’t personally because I am probably secretly an ice storm in disguise, but I still respect my partner’s desires. If they’re the type to want love and sex to coincide, I let them. I don’t make fun, I don’t pull one-night-stands or friends-with-benefits, because it’s not their “reputation” I’m afraid for: it’s their heart I’m defending.

    Here’s the thing: Instead of worrying about people’s “purity” and how it defines them as a person, worry instead about how you can protect other people’s emotions.

    Because here’s the thing: look around your room and spot the virgins. Look harder. You can’t tell. Sex doesn’t alter people, it doesn’t make them act in a certain way nor dress in a certain manner. Sex and personality have nothing to do with each other. There’s a reason that virginity doesn’t show on someone’s face: because having sex doesn’t cause you to change.

    "
    — "I lost my virginity to a boy I didn’t even love…" /// r.i.d (via inkskinned)

    (via thedavesofourlives)

     

  7. eatingisfab:

    my beauty is called ugly

    (via hotboyproblems)

     

  8. avicil:

    My facial acne is becoming symmetrical by appearing on the same opposite side of my face. Does this mean my face is symmetrically perfect or that Jesus wants me to look stupid?

     
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  10. juliansballclenchingfalsetto:

    "being interested in pop culture makes you vapid and unintelligent"

    translation: im a miserable pissbaby. im deep because i smoke cheap cigarettes and take my coffee black. have u ever heard of friedrich nietzsche. im so alone.

    (via hotboyproblems)